It is now an absolute certainty that I am a divorcee and the children are all under my custody. Recently I read in the newspaper about this 12 years old Bi-Anne who is in between the two parents and both side has a story. What would be the outcome ? Who knows and how will it affect all the three persons, it surely will but to what extend, I can't be sure. There are many assumption, if she lives with her mum in London, she will probably grow up in a different environment, receive different educational system, on the other side, if she lives with her dad, what would be the environment as the dad said in the newspaper, he lives in Jinjang and his lifestyle and environment is associated with gangsterism even though he was not involved. Good luck to them !
Another friend who is not in good relationship with the wife, is going through temporary separation. I asked him what is the motive of your wife taking the children away ? He answered, is the ultimate term that he should come back to her. Will one just say ok and go back to the marriage ? Can anyone think beyond all and sacrifice for the sake of the children ? To continue to live in an estranged relationship for the sake of the children ? It's tough and not easy and in my case, I think it is easier, one party decided firmly and left no alternative for at all.
I have three growing up kids, they have been through with me since 2007 separation. These days kids are much more matured that you think. They can sense what is happening in the family and they cope with it. It is now coming to 4 years, I often asked myself can I carry on this life, a life that is healthy for them, educating them the right way ? Am I good enough to guide them to be successful ? Can I do it ? What if I fail, what would happen to them ?
When this thought comes by, I fear and fear even more ! I also tell myself there is only so much you can do ! Don't push yourself too much ! I had my relative who told me she decided to be a housewife as her salary would not be enough to pay for the maid and other expenses, her choice is to stay at home and give the children the motherly love. Hearing this, I began to think if my children are getting enough love and attention from me ? How much can a single mum handle work and kids together ? I must be honest that it is not easy at all, I have my limits and when they get too loud or overly hyper, I need them to stop. It is very confusing at times, when they are so happy, rejoicing and playing together but I told them to slow down, am I stopping them to be happy ? Is this right ?
Just some of my thoughts and I feel the kids are doing ok....they are growing up to be more understanding !
Love you all kids !
